The papers have entered again into the credulous and wooly-headed “Spielberg Zone.” Yesterday, the Wall Street Journal broke the story that St. Steven and his loyal sidekick, David Geffen, are on the verge of suckering an Indian company to bail them out of their Paramount mess and, inexplicably, set them back up in their own mini studio.

That’s not how the WSJ put it, however:

The principals of DreamWorks SKG are close to a deal with one of India’s biggest entertainment conglomerates to form a new movie venture, according to people familiar with the situation, a move that would give director Steven Spielberg the cash to finance his DreamWorks team’s departure from Viacom Inc.’s Paramount Pictures later this year.

Mumbai-based Reliance ADA Group would provide Mr. Spielberg and company with $500 million to $600 million in equity, moving them one step closer to ending one of Hollywood’s most contentious and closely watched battles. In Reliance, the DreamWorks team also would have an unusual and ambitious partner in the film business: an Indian firm with interests in telecommunications, financial services and entertainment that wants to build a media empire by financing Hollywood pictures.

Let’s parse what exactly those sentences really mean:

The principals of DreamWorks SKG are close to a deal with one of India’s biggest entertainment conglomerates to form a new movie venture …

Steven Speilberg and David Geffen have found some suckers to bail themselves out of the sticky position they got themselves in when they sold their company to Paramount.

….. a move that would give director Steven Spielberg the cash to finance his DreamWorks team’s departure from Viacom Inc.’s Paramount Pictures later this year. …

After unloading their failed DreamWorks movie studio on Paramount for an overpriced $1.6 billion, Spielberg and Geffen have decided they don’t like working for the man. They do still like the $1.6 billion, however, so they have to find a new sugar daddy.

… Mumbai-based Reliance ADA Group would provide Mr. Spielberg and company with $500 million to $600 million in equity, moving them one step closer to ending one of Hollywood’s most contentious and closely watched battles. …

The last time around it was Microsoft founder Paul Allen. After Paramount bought DreamWorks, the studio was under the amusing misconception that it owned DreamWorks. That upset Mr. Spielberg terribly. This time the Indian company will be funding the pair’s big dreams and tending to the delicate sensibilities of Spielberg, who will repay the favor, as he did his original investors, by making his biggest movies for other studios,

In Reliance, the DreamWorks team also would have an unusual and ambitious partner in the film business: an Indian firm with interests in telecommunications, financial services and entertainment that wants to build a media empire by financing Hollywood pictures.

Since everyone in Hollywood knows how and why Dreamworks failed, the pair have gone overseas for some less sophisticated investors who will pay a premium for some entree to Hollywood. And this time they won’t even get Jeffrey Katzenberg, who will be staying at Paramount with his fabulously successful animation studio.

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Previously in Hitsville:

Scary Steven Spielberg!